Women Vs Weight

** This short post has been inspired by Scrubs Season 2 Episode 3 titled 'My Case Study' **

There are, perhaps, only a handful of women who'd honestly and confidently say, 'I'm the right size and I'm happy with my body.'

The rest of us fair, lesser mortals are doomed to whining about our over-sized (or undersized) busts, bellies and behinds (However my pet peeve are my 'biceps'. They fall under the over-sized category. In your face, Yokozuna).

My own life is really a chart from Chubby to Overweight to Obese to Plump and back to Annoyingly Overweight. There has never been a Just Right.

W vs W is a timeless battle and I personally don't have any girl friends who have won the 'war'. I guess you can blame it on the fashion industry who decides what is the next size 0 (If I got it right, it's currently 32-24-32) or maybe even that big group of male jerks (oops, did I just anger my male friends? You're not part of them, sweeties!). But in the end, it all boils down to your own self-esteem.

I admire those handful of women who don't really care how their bodies look. They haven't let themselves 'go'. In fact, they are the only ones who truly appreciate themselves and know what's really important in life.

I'm striving to be like that. To be Healthy and forget about Weight. Obviously it's very difficult. But definitely achieveable.

:)

Sandeep

A chubby face. Barely any strength left. Trapped in his body. Unable to speak. That's how Sandeep Menon, my batchmate, spent his last few hours on earth.

If I could imagine his free spirit right now, he would be hovering right over my shoulder, laughing at every word I typed. 'Trapped?' he'd say, 'Damn right! But chubby? Give me a break, I was still as handsome as ever!'

That's how I remember Sandeep: Funny, enthusiastic, positive, this one bright beam of energy.

He was not my close friend. I can't tell you what his favorite color was or how he liked his food. But he was one of those magnetic personalities whom you couldn't draw away from.

Everyone from my college days knew who Sandeep Menon was. And almost everybody can tell you how he touched their lives.

In my case, he gave me that extra shot of confidence. He never once made fun of my broken Malayalam. Called me pretty when I felt least so. And when I was most worried about changing jobs, all he said was 'Go for it. You won't regret it.' And I haven't. Not one bit.

Like I said, I didn't know Sandeep much. I visited him when he got sick for the first time. Met him a couple of times in Bangalore. Scrapped each other on facebook. After that, I didn't keep in touch.

When Sandeep got hospitalized for the last time, I didn't want to see him. I preferred to keep only happy memories of him inside. Call me a coward, if you will.

Sheryl let me know as we spoke on the phone, 'I can't imagine a world without him.'

I don't think a lot of people can.

Right now, I can't get myself to say 'Sandeep, may you rest in peace.' Because having known him, this would be more apt: 'Dude, have a great time at that never ending party in the sky'.

Anyway, Sandeep, my man, someday we'll meet again. Till then, I have to say... goodbye.

Musings

Ever get the feeling that you're the only constant factor in your own world?

Everything and everybody else is racing against time. People have their own agenda, own dreams to fulfil.

And you? You find yourself flailing about in self-doubt and uncertainity.

Sigh.

It's times like this when I get comfort from these lyrics of a song:'... Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives; some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't...'

Now I wait for that epiphany to strike...

Back to where I started from...

Knowing myself, I was sure that it was just a matter of time before I reached this state. So here goes: Personally speaking, I liked Korea more than I do Bangalore.

There's NOTHING to do here.

Maybe it was the novelty of a new country, but I truly had fun in South Korea.

Anyway, that put aside, here's news from my Bangalore-ian life: Someone's stolen my porch light bulb and I haven't seen my newspapers all week.

Ladies and gentlemen: Welcome to India.

To All My Friends...

... See you soon because BABY, I'M COMING HOME!! :D

Yes, today is my last day in S Korea. I'm heading back to Bangalore tomorrow morning.

Am I unhappy to leave Suwon? Sure, coz these are the things I'll definitely miss:
1. Being able to stay out late (this includes work/late night movie shows/midnight cravings for M&Ms which lead to trips to HomePlus)
2. Pollution-free AND traffic-free commutes to work
3. The lack of bloody-thirsty autorikshaw drivers.
4. The luxury of having someone cooking for me
5. My weekend outings :(

Oh great. Now I feel sad.

Buuut I hope I'll get a chance to come back at some point and go on that trip to Everland. :)

As of now, there's no place like home. Right? :)

Why I hate shopping and other solved mysteries

Many people think that girls, by default, love shopping.

I beg to differ. I absolutely detest it. In fact, I prefer grocery-shopping.

Really.

So when I am asked by my friends to go shopping, I inwardly sigh and groan. Because that usually means a one-day trip to countless number of stores where the person concerned chooses a dress, scrutinizes it, decides that she doesn't like really those buttons and then dumps the dress back on the rack. If it's REALLY my lucky day, she'll be tempted to try it on and then we'll go through an inch-by-inch analysis of how the whole outfit fits her. And then she'll decide that she doesn't like those buttons anyway and then dumps the dress back on the rack.

Let's take the case of my sister, Bes, who visited Suwon the past weekend.

She takes fancy to a pair of very pretty lavender shoes at HomePlus. 'Buy it or if you're that unsure, we'll go visit another mall', I say. She decides to pass and move on. So enter Kim's Club. We discover nada there after 1 hour of browsing. It's late so we call it a day. The next day, we go to a Seoul station shoe vendor. Bes likes a pair of black shoes there. 'But do I really want it? Will it go with all my clothes?' she asks. 'Who cares? Just buy it! Its just $10!' I say. 'I don't want to buy something just for the sake of it!' she says after she gives those shoes a longing look as we head out to Namdaemun market. Eventually we find out that the big place doesn't give any room for my sis to satisfy her feet. So we backtrack to Seoul station. 'You just have to buy those shoes, you know' I tell Bes. After some 10 minutes of staring at those particular black shoes and trying them on, she says no. 'I prefer the ones from HomePlus'. On our way back, we drop into another shore store at Suwon station ('Just in case I like something'). Surprise surprise. Zilch there.

So once again, we go back to where we started: HomePlus. She picks out two dresses and two pairs of matching shoes (one of which is the same lavender pair she had her eyes on since the previous evening). 'Which one pair should I buy?' she asks. 'Make life easier and get both!' I say, frankly, a lil sick of looking at shoes all day.

'Of course not!' she retorts 'I have value for money!'

But apparently not for time. Phooey.

While my sister wrings her hands in despair to make up her mind, I set up camp at the shoe section.

Gonna be one long night.

But she makes a decision in less than 20 minutes.

Really.

She decides to buy one dress and both pairs of shoes (not lavender, but the same shoes in grey).

So. Do you see what I mean?

Ok, I'm not saying that I'm the perfect angel. In fact, I need moral support when I do decide to go shopping (which is only once in 3 months or something - thank God). That's because whatever I like never comes in my size or price range. I mean, c'mon, just because I'm a big person doesn't mean that I don't have taste in clothes and neither do I rather prefer to look like a clown. On the appointed day, I rally up some of my good friends (Or those whose are bored stiff doing nothing on the weekend) and I depend on them to help me through those nightmares. When I get depressed, friends give me cocoa and a pep-talk to lift my spirits up. Then they prod me into trying out stuff so that I'll eventually get through the day with at least one piece in hand.

Usually I'm satisfied with my new outfit till around 3 months later, my sis complains that my clothes are getting old.

'Oh no!' I think, 'It's time for another cocoa-guzzling session!!'

:)

[PS Girlfriends/Sisters, I still love our shopping trips! :) ]
[PPS Genius, this post mentions no 'other solved mysteries' :P]

Photos

This is the link that I promised to provide in my previous post. It has Seoul pics, mostly shot by my sis.